If you haven’t read part one of this little story, go ahead and do so now: Moses, fishnets, and those tasty little cookies with sprinkles on them, Part I.

The rest of the story — not to get all Paul Harvey on anyone — is only slightly less weird. After the fishnet-clad [estimated] 16 year old ran into the ladies room, some guy who by all appearances suffered from some sort of mental disability, chased after her. At this point I really wanted to go home. I was prepared for anything, you know, as long as “anything” was obnoxious chubby Jewish girls and goofy balding Jewish guys. Fishnets and the differently-abled was decidedly not in the brochure.

Sam and I pressed on, however, buoyed by the realization that the two girls I’d walked right past without acknowledging were, in fact, people I knew. (I forgot to mention that some time between the 5 year-old pimping me to his underage sister and the drama with the retarded guy, Sam and I walked right past 2 girls I had invited to this thing. Sam suggested we bring backup. Whatever). Having formed a little power-circle with the 2 girls, things maintained some level of normality.

Of course, the girls left, and Sam and I again where left to fend for ourselves. I thought we were doing a pretty good job at it; I’d managed to stuff my face with a bunch of cookies, and no one had come to talk to us. Of course, who should walk in? The aforementioned sixteen year old. And her clearly inebriated friend.

Now, it was a Friday night, granted, so I guess seeing some drunk chick hanging off her friend, saying shit like “Where’s the fuckin’ alchohol”, wearing a stained shirt and reeking of booze shouldn’t come as any great surprise. But in a synagogue? After a Shabbat service? Huh? Of course, things only got stranger, as the drunk girl licked the underage girl, and then proceeded to show us her pentagram tattoo. So if the “eating pork”, “not keeping the Sabbath holy” or “coveting thy neighbor’s wife” things didn’t do it, I can definitely punch my ticket straight to hell.

But hey, at least I’ll know one of the devil’s minions, right?