Now, I know it’s not quite the ballsack-slappy motion animated .gif picture, but I think the fact that my site is the first to come up when you google for “laguna beach drinking game” is pretty darn cool. (If you missed that post, it’s right here. And didja notice how I slipped the exact search term AND a link to the page in there, further solidfying my stranglehold on the number one slot? So sneaky, I am).

In honor of that grand accomplishment, I present to you a few other rather odd things people used during the month of November to find my little corner of the Information Super-Highway:

1. is talan torriero gay?. Um, well, you know the old saying: “If you have to ask…”
2. official website of jessica smith from laguna beach. Now, I don’t actually claim to be the “official” website of Jessica Smith, but I do claim to be the “unofficial” website of her breasts. Hopefully Ms. Smith and I can come to some understanding in that regard and she’ll grant me (and this website) some exclusive access to her boobs.
3. who invented the frozen burrito. We all know by now it was Casey’s step-dad. C’mon people, get with the program.
4. kyle poopoo. I assume whoever searched for this absolutely LOVES my blog.
5. flip cup redondo. Hellz fuckin’ yeah, flip cup Redondo takes you to my page. Team One-Banger 4 Life, bitches.
6. jason and cedric homo relationship. As me and my friend Dan like to say “Hey, I’m not sayin’ anything, I’m just sayin’“.
7. socal coed videos. Proof that the readers of JeremyAbramson.com™ really like to masturbate.
8. coach bill cower chin. I honestly wonder how many other “coach bill cower chin” links this person had to peruse in order to find my blog.
9. abramson high school 2005 prom. Now, the rumors of me and my supposed predilection for — ahem — “less worldy” females are greatly exaggerated. That being said, if anyone actually had invited me to prom this past year, I most certainly would have gone. But only if I could wear the purple tux I wore to my prom back in 1996.