Since yesterday was April Fools (Fool’s? I’m too lazy to look it up) Day, I’ll drop a little dating knowledge on you guys, Jigga style. (Some of you lucky enough to have read my old journal may know this already. If so, keep quiet, aite?)

It’s a pretty simple system; much easier than something like Frank “TJ” Mackey’s “Search and Destroy” program, and it requires absolutely no up-front cost or commitment.  And it completely eliminates most people’s reason for not asking people out: the fear of rejection.  With my method, there’s nothing to worry about!

There is, however, one significant downfall of the system, which will be painfully evident in a second. So, without further ado:

JeremyAbramson.com™ presents Jigga’s Foolproof Dating Method
Step 1. Wait for April Fools (Fool’s?) day
Step 2. Ask girl.guy out
Step 3 (if s/he says yes). Go out. Enjoy. Send Jeremy a huge box of chocolates thanking him for the revolutionary dating system
Step 3 (if s/he says no). Tell him/her it was all a big April Fools (Fool’s?) joke.
Step 4. Repeat until success.

So it only works once a year.  And if you’re just reading this now, since it’s already April 2nd, you’re probably going to have to wait until next year.  But it’ll be worth it, right?  I mean, it’s foolproof!

But honestly, if that creepy dude from eHarmony can make millions on lonely people, I don’t see how I can’t at least get some goddamn chocolate.